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Patton Oswalt Takes Spin for a… Test Drive? New Daniel Tosh Live Shows Announced!
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Yeah, yeah, vegetarians are hilarious. It's just too easy to make fun of their sunken eyes and ashen complexions, their impotently inflammatory propaganda depicting mass-murdered piglets, and the way their farts smell like broccoli, riiiiight?

But wait. Shane Mauss isn't All Comedians — what about the rest of them? Can these claims by the Huffington Post be true, that 13 of our very favorite comedians are actually closet vegetarians (and by closet vegetarians, we mean proud vegetarians who are¬†really vocal about their choice the reasoning thereof)? How can it be? Of whom will we make fun?

Turns out, the reasons to avoid meat are so plentiful, it's becoming laughable to keep eating it:

  • Over 40% of the world's grain is grown just to feed to livestock, and scientists have found that all that grain, water, and land could go to better use feeding humans directly. (You know those "starving kids in China" your mom was always talking about? Yeah…)
  • Meat that goes bad is harder to compost, and becomes just… wasteful waste. Just ask this awkward fellow, who actually doesn't compost rotten meat, so much as he cooks perfectly good meat in a compost pile, and wastes some plastic bags along the way!
  • Thanks to the "progress" of yesteryear,¬†antibiotics and hormones pollute our environment and us along with it…
  • Big Beef, Big Lamb(?) and their fatcat meat industry buddies are responsible for some of the highest emissions in the food farming industry…
  • And our personal favorite: the surprisingly substantial methane pollution from manure and "animal release." Yup: poop and farts.

So even if you have trouble seeing yourself as a cud-chewing, patchouli-stanking cat lady of a vegetarian, get smart about the meat you eat. And maybe even start dabbling in vegetarianism, a few days a week. All the cool kids are doing it.



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